...and I am a blog stalker.
I have quite a few blogs that I read on a regular basis and (as far as I know) none of them know that I read their blogs. Tonight I left a comment on a fellow Army wife's blog that will also be at Fort Polk soon. I felt good about it when I did it, but now I'm all nervous and insecure and worried that I shouldn't have. This blog has been mine and only mine for a long time. Brian and my mom read it and that was all. Well, occasionally my brother would read it too, but that was rare.
I am afraid that if I know others are reading this that I will censor myself. I want to be able to write whatever whenever I want. I want to feel like I am not being judged. On the other hand, what if people judge me? Will it change who I am or the life I lead? Do I say anything on here that is hateful, hurtful, or untrue? The vast majority of what I write is how I feel and how I feel is always honest and true at least in that moment.
So, tonight I took a leap of faith. I put myself out there. I hope it turns out to be a blessing. I hope that in the future I feel able to reach out to others through the world wide web. I mean, if everyone else can do it why can't I?
I guess we'll see.
S.
1 comment:
It's very nice to have you comment, and I was hoping to meet some more bloggers that are/will be at Ft. Polk. as far as censoring yourself goes, you might. I started to censor myself when I found out other people were reading my blog. I am in day to day life, silly, sometimes vulgar, and honest to a flaw. I think most of that comes out but not in the same way I'd like to sometimes. My husband reads my blog too. He enjoys reading it, loves it. There have been times though that I would have liked to write about some of the problems we've had during the deployment, but didn't or took them down because it was considered airing dirty laundry. People don't talk much about the really ugly side of deployment, and I'd have liked to but censored it. If you feel like you start to censor, write the post without publishing it. It helps me.
I'm glad you've been reading, and I hope that you continue to comment with me and others, too. The community has been great and is sometimes closer for me than the community on post. Thanks again. Very nice to "meet" you.
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