Overwhelming Wedding

Want to know why I haven't blogged in so many days? I've had too many ideas in my head. No, not too few - too many. Really? Yes. I have too many things I want to write about and they'd each take too long to compose so I've been avoiding.

I tend to do that when things are too overwhelming - avoid avoid avoid! So, what's been on my mind lately?

• Wedding stuff (as always)!!
• Family coming this weekend.
• Being too critical of myself in comparisons to others (all others).
• Exercise and not being happy with my body lately.
• Organization. Freakin organization.

I could write a novel on any of those topics. Seriously. Maybe I should organize myself and work on a post for each. Am I that dedicated and *shudder* organized? I doubt it.

How about we start with something that I seem to always be dealing with but never writing about: wedding stuff. I know, I know...it's probably not high on anyone's priority list to read about my wedding woes, but sometimes a girl's just gotta vent.

Wedding planning in a word is overwhelming. There are SO many decisions to be made both large and small. I don't find the big decisions (reception, food, dress, colors, etc.) to be very difficult. I have a definite style and I trust my instincts. It's the little things that get me everytime. What packaging should I use for the favors? How elaborate should I make the favors? Should I make the favors? How do I make black chairs at the reception go with my navy blue and ivory colors? Expensive, elaborate linens or cheap, industrial linens? Should I put pictures of us on the cake tables? Music! What about music? Do we have to have a first dance? Do we have to do the garter/bouquet toss? I don't think we'll have enough single people!

I could keep going, but I'll put you out of your misery. The last couple days I've been lost in the land of wedding websites, products and etsy. (Etsy will be the death of me.) What about my hair? Should I wear some sort of hair jewelry piece? And makeup! What will make me look stunning and radiant in all of my pictures? See? It just pops up in my brain like that. I have no control!!

I want my wedding to be a reflection of me. I don't need it to be elaborate or fancy shmancy, but I want there to be a few things that are unique and make people go "Wow, how neat/pretty/gorgeous/amazing!" You get the idea. I surely can't be the only bride who has felt this way. It's so easy to get lost in it! I'm trying to keep my feet planted firmly on the ground. I do not want to lose myself and lose sight of the true intention of the day: to celebrate my marriage with my closest friends and family. No one will judge me for what I don't have at the wedding. No one will notice if there aren't pictures on the cake tables. Sure, they'll notice if there are, but they won't miss something they don't know could have been there, ya know?

I'm feeling the wedding crunch. We're under 5 months away and the pressure is starting to mount. Decisions need to be made and things need to be ordered. I know the months will fly and I want to be as prepared as possible so I'm not losing my mind in those last few weeks (although I probably will anyway). I can't wait for August 1st so I can be past all of this planning and finally see the finished product - and my amazing family that is traveling from far and farther to be there.

Perhaps I'll get to the other topics later or tomorrow. Please don't hold your breath.

S.